Develop Your Interpersonal Skills to Become a Social GIANT!

One of the most important things to develop as a social person is good interpersonal skills. If you aren’t used to being around people, talking to people, or are kind of introverted, it might not be easy for you.

On some level everyone is a “closet introvert.” What you need to realize is that only a few things are needed to become a really good communicator, be the life of the party, and have fun interacting with people in general.

The biggest thing to realize is that people follow decisive leaders. Whatever you feel they will feel. Whenever you are interacting with someone, it is important to speak CLEARLY with a strong intent.

Interpersonal Skills: Own it!

The more you can OWN whatever you say, the more people will respect you, and you’ll be able to get your ideas out and well received. You can not have any self doubt in your communication. Put a big smile on your face, LISTEN to what other people say, and bring out your side of the conversation.

The problem many people have is that they try too hard to think of the exact right thing to say. This is less important than you think, especially when you are just starting to get to know someone, the conversation doesn’t need a specific game plan. Just let it flow and see where it goes.

Many people go into analysis by paralysis because they are worried that what they say isn’t important enough, and the other person won’t care to hear about what they have to say. This is partially a self esteem issue as well, but from a technical level, the easiest way to get better with communicating to other people is to assume that everything you say is great, because YOU say it!

Interpersonal Skills: Nonverbal Communication

Another aspect of becoming a good interpersonal communicator is to study how the other person is responding to you. Things to look at would be body language, eye contact, their tone of voice, as well as how quickly they are to respond to you, and the physical proximity they have as they converse with you.

Teamwork Skills Are Also Important

You can then calibrate if you are coming on too strong, if the conversation is going well, if you need to be more authoritative, or more relaxed. An old IT term is called pinging, and it is good to ping off of the other person so you naturally mutually come into a rhythm.

Your best bet to get better interpersonal skills is to go out and start becoming more social in your day to day life. Whether you are ordering a coffee at starbucks, chat up the barista serving your drink. If you are walking down the street and someone smiles at you, strike up a conversation. And if you see a coworker on the elevator, ask them about their day and start pushing your comfort zone to become more comfortable talking to people in your day to day life.